Impact

So, even though I am exhausted from my adventures today, it is a quiet evening - Brant is at a Bible study, the boys are down, and I am enjoying my country music and pumpkin spice candle and a chance to put some thoughts down in writing that I've been mulling over the past week or so.

We normally go to Indonesian church, but last week decided to take a break and go to the international church (translated: AC and worship music in our own language). It was such a God-thing that we were there. The speaker was sick, so instead they showed a video of Phil Vischer giving his testimony. He's the guy who created Veggie Tales, and for those of you not up on Veggie Tale corporate history, several years ago VT was sued and they lost the suit, and Vischer lost everything - including control of the company.

Anyways, he shared what the Lord taught him through the whole process of the lawsuit and afterwards when his ministry was totally taken away from him. He quoted someone (didn't write it down, but I think it was CS Lewis) that "He who has anything plus God has nothing more than he who has God alone." and that God was THE most important thing... sounds basic but it works out like this...

The housewife in America who has the Lord and who does nothing more than watch her kids has nothing more than the missionary who has the Lord and a great ministry who reaches hundreds of people for Christ.

Ooohhhh, sounds convicting to me, the missionary, who can sometimes think too much of myself and my great commitment to ministry.

But the other aspect of this whole thought process, is that, at the moment, I do not really have "ministry" as we planned it in our minds. The plan was to go into a tribe - learn the language, translate, teach the Bible, plant a church, etc. etc. Right now, I am taking care of 3 little boys (I know, I know, ministry in itself) and teaching yearbook to a bunch of MKs. Not what I had in mind when I signed up for the whole missionary thing.

So, that leads to the rest. "The impact we desire to have for God does not come when we pursue that impact" ...it comes when we pursue the most important thing... God Himself. Pursuing God is more important than reaching tribes, translating Scripture or even taking care of little boys.

Vischer brought up the struggle he had after he lost VT... what to do next? I felt (and still feel) the same way when our plans to join the tribal work we were "supposed" to join fell apart. What are we supposed to be doing over here? Brant and I have gone around and around on this issue... we were sent here to do a job and all the doors have slammed shut in our faces and we're left teaching high schoolers and wondering what to do next.

So our thought process has led us to try to think up ministry plans for ourselves... "We could..." and fill in the blank a million different ways. But you never see people in Scripture trying to figure out what they are supposed to be doing to "serve the Lord." They just wait on the Lord... and pursue Him. Noah, for example, "walked in close fellowship with God" ...for 500 years before he got his great ministry opportunity.

And if you think about it, how can God use someone with great plans who isn't walking with Him? (Not saying great plans mean you're not walking with the Lord, but meaning someone who relies on his plans, not the Lord) We have to be in close enough fellowship with Him that we can hear Him when He can give us instructions so His work gets done in His way for His glory.

So Brant and I have been praying about it and have committed to walking with the Lord... learning to listen to His voice and spending more time with Him, so that when the next door opens we will hear Him and be able to follow His leading.

I can't figure out if this all makes sense or sounds really complicated or exceedingly simple. Sorry. Still in process. But we would appreciate prayer that we would really take this time to walk in close fellowship with the Lord and wait on Him and not worry about what comes next.